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The mission of Holding Space Practice is to teach people life-changing principles and practices that transform emotional suffering into personal resiliency and empowerment.
I was a Silent, Secret Sufferer
Some of my questions included these:
-- Why do I feel frustrated that I can’t seem to accomplish what I feel like I need or want to?
-- Why do I set goals and have dreams that never seem to work for me?
-- Why does it seem like some people “glide” through life and get whatever they want?
-- Why do some people seem to “glow” or be “attractive” while others seem “dark” or “repulsive”?
I hid myself because...
From my late teens until my 40s, I looked happy and successful on the outside, but behind closed doors I was suffering more than I ever let on.
I knew I had “some” depression and anxiety that I kept secret, but I was able to cope with the worst of it by spending time alone, isolated from everyone.
I hid myself because I was so emotionally charged that I was afraid I would say or do something hurtful. If I didn’t interact with anyone, I wouldn’t snap at them or melt down into a puddle of tears. The intense feeling would eventually pass and I could enter back into society again.
I was an ace at "fake it 'til you make it"... but I was not making it at all!
I didn't want to burden others or embarrass myself. I wanted to serve others and be good and nice, so I "lost myself" in that service. Being busy allowed me to set aside my internal monsters in public... and I could sob and suffer behind closed doors.
Keeping my internal struggles invisible
was how I coped.
Being a mother was a lifelong dream, but parenting was much more difficult than I had imagined.
I tried so hard to be a sweet, patient and loving mom. But my internal monsters would not let me, and it made me and my children miserable.
I used to cope with depression and anxiety by shutting myself away from everything and everyone, but you can't leave infants and toddlers to fend for themselves until the darkness passes.
I had no idea how to get my children to "behave." I was exhausted and starting to realize that there was a medical term for the symptoms I felt called fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue and depression.
I heard a professional's message loud and clear, “if fibromyalgia is not resolved, it leads to either lupus or MS.”
I was determined to find solutions. I wanted to raise my children and be around for grandchildren!
Over the course of two decades of searching, answers emerged...
...I learned how to hold space for myself, my family and others. The Holding Space Practice is where I wrote down and organized the methods and practices that took me from miserable to calm, peaceful and healthy!
I am on a mission to help others find answers quickly!
More of Carol's story...
...The Price of Healing...
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